Leaving Nicaragua

I woke a 1:45, unable to sleep. I lay awake until it was time to get up and go. We all met up and crossed the busy highway at 3:30...fun and adventurous. We arrived at the airport early, and ended up standing in line for a while before we were able to actually check in and head through security and to our gates. It was so hard watching Managua grow smaller as we ascended, I held back all emotion. We landed in Houston, made it through custom without any problem and called mom. My facebook status that day was "Toilet paper now goes in the toilet and the drinking fountain water can be drunk." Three of us girls had a blast sitting in the very back row of the plane, we actually met some pretty cool people who were waiting for the bathroom. Seattle was a near nightmare. We had about 15 minutes to get to our gate, and get our boarding passes. When we landed we found out that our gate was at the opposite end of the airport. We all ran. We made it in record breaking time only to be told we weren't on that flight. We all had the flight number and everything. The man who helped us was no help, leaving us frustrated. What was more frustrated was that we were only an hour from home. We made a call to the travel agency who had booked our flights and they told us we had been changed to a later flight. We then realized the gate was on the other end of the airport...only a couple gates down from the flight we had just gotten off of. So, we ran again. We all held our breath as we checked in. And sighed in relief when we were all on the flight. Soon we were headed home...it was very bittersweet to me. I missed home, I missed mom and the kids, but I wanted so badly just to be back in Nicaragua. I love the ride from Seattle to home, by the time you are done ascending, you descend. It short and sweet. We all walked together chatting about when we would see eachother next. I saw mom, Kyla, Trey, and Amy, with my birthday gift-a puppy. Everyone looked so white after being with Nicaraguan children for the last 10 days. After getting our luggage and giving hugs to team we then go home. I'm happy, until all the gifts are handed out and I'm left with the longing to be back. For the next three days I cry. I cry because I want to be back. I miss so much about it. It changed me, taught me, and began to mold me. When in a different country, you forget about your fear of small creature and how you hate to be sweaty. You forgot about how you look and what you wear. You forget about comfort. And you live. For those ten days I realized what it felt like to live with meaning. I realized how stress free it was to live so simply and humbly for 10 days. Those 10 days were days that may very possibly be the happiest of my entire life. The joy there is contagious as well as the smiles. How HE loves to offer me a trip like this. How HE loves to send me, to mold me, and to show me what He accepts as pure and faultless. How HE loves. It's been 5 weeks since we arrived home. 5 weeks. But not one day has gone by that I haven't thought of Nicaragua. Haven't missed it. Haven't wanted to be there. A couple days after returning home I was in church, the day was hot and beautiful as we walked into our church. The air condition welcomed us, and we sat in comfort. But my heart was longing deeply for Nicaragua. Half way through the service thunder crackled and rain began to pour. I mean pour.

It made me smile. It felt as though God sent it for me. He brought me comfort through the rain. How He loves. This journey hasn't stopped in Nicaragua. I sat in church again a couple weeks after returning. My hear cry was "God, why can't I be there?" I truly felt Him laugh at me, a laugh as though HE knows what HE holds for my future. Many sleepless nights, many rainy days, many small creatures, many children, many days full of laughter, smiles, and joy. But I know what will also accompany the days in other countries, seeing the broken, battered and lost. Tears, pain and sorrow. But still HE whispers to my aching soul. "I have great plans for you. You'll go."