4 weeks ago I walked through security, with the words "my adventure has begin" ringing through my head. I didn't know what God had planned for me, but I knew it was good. I remember the moments of doubt and all I could hear from Him was "because you love me better, that's why you will go." and here I am 4 weeks later. I am so incredibly blessed in this place. I wake to this cries of children, children I have fallen in love with. I help dress them and brush their teeth and feed them. I play with them and let them braid my hair. I help teach them their numbers and letter and color with them. But what I give is so much less than I have taken away from this experience. Their love, their faces, their resilience. Their stories are unfathomable, but here they stand loving anyway, trusting freely. Because this place is more than an orphanage, it's a home with mamas who will be here for them and aunties who come visit them and love them. I listen in amazement as they sing songs praising Jesus. Jesus is so good. The time has gone by so quickly and I know my heart will break to leave, but God has bigger plans for my life that at this point I have no idea what they are. I know I will return back to Africa one day. But the next 4 years may be lived in the states going through college and growing in Christ... I still have 13 days to treasure these children and make more memories of this beautiful place with all the beautiful smiles. I am thankful for a God who is so big and yet small enough to hear us.

I walk down the dirt road I have walked many times in the first 3 weeks of living here. This time is different though, I have a moby wrapped baby tied to me. She is just over a year old and everything is new to her. Her eyes grow wide as we walk past the black birds sitting on the fence, she watchings the trees intently. She kicks her legs a little and she giggles that sweet small giggle. We arrive at the restrurant and I order vanilla ice cream for her. She tries a bit and spits it out- too cold. I scoop up some melted ice cream and after tasting she begins to beg for more, her mouth wide open I spoon more for her. When it's gone she still reaches for the bowl, wanting more. She begins to sing little songs. It fills me. This precious little one who's home is across a ocean from me, this little one whom I was so excited to meet... She sits here on my lap giggling. It's surreal, all these months of fundraising and the excitement of coming building each day, here I am. On an ice cream date with this child. I am so blessed. I am so happy. And HE is so good.

I wake at 6:30 or 7. The boys laughter keeps me awake. I lay on my back for a while, before lifting my mosquito net and climbing out. I have until 8:45 to dress, eat, Facebook... At 8:45 I head downstairs for preschool I sit with the two year olds. Half way through the two year olds are dismissed and we head to another building where we read, color, practice colors, and play. At 10 I have a break until 11. Drink a coke, listen to audiobook... At 11 we head outside and play with the kids, at 12:15 I go back with the girls and they eat, bathe, put diapers on and then go down for nap. I'm free from 1:15- 4:00. We sometimes will go into town, or just take a nap and hang out. At 4 I have one-on-one time with one of the kids, OR I'm outside doing activities with the kids. That last for two hours, and then it's dinner, bathe, diapers, pjs, brush teeth, bed, and then the mosquito nets go over the beds. There are 16 girls, most of them are still crawling age. I was the only volunteer in the girls room for the first 2 weeks and it is so wonderful to have another volunteer helping. Bedtime is the craziest part of my day and I walk away so tired. For dinner I have top ramen, cookies, toast, banana, pineapple... Whatever I feel like making. And then my day is done. It's a rewarding day.

If you have never come to Africa you are missing out. I am falling in love with this place. It's outside my comfort zone for sure. Some sights you see makes you shake your head and say "this is Africa..." like storks in a dumpster, a dirty boy in a suit, a boy sleeping on the ground... The potholes in the road. I was asked by a teenaged boy to buy him some food, and being told that there are ministries and these street children choose freedom over filled bellies, I told him no. I also recognized him from begging before. It breaks my heart to walk away, but I know they know/think that they can trick mzungus (white people) into buying food. So I walk away and leave him to beg other people. While Jesus says to feed and clothe the hungry, I don't think He met to give free handouts and make teenagers believe they can get through life off of tourist. Over lunch today a small boy was watching us eat, his empty eyes and tore clothes showed us he was truly living in poverty. We offered him a piece of flat bread and he thanked us and began to eat it. There is something about these street kids that intrigue me... How can I say no to one boy, and yes to another? If the mzungus began to hand out to the kids it would eventually be like setting a Seaworld dolphin into the ocean after years of having every single meal brought to it... It would starve and die not knowing how to fend for itself. It's finding balance here, yes, I wish I could sit down and buy all these street kids meals, but there are ministries who know of a better way to care for them and if they wished to they could go have a meal and a place to sleep.... But it still breaks my heart. And that's a good thing.

Most years on Easter I am home making a copycat recipe of cinnabons. Most years I eat candy until I am ready to burst. This year is the first year I haven't spent it with my family. Today I went to church service held outside with the sun beaming down on me (not many can say they went to church on Easter Sunday and got a tan) our opening song was sung in Lugandan so we clapped our hands instead. We sat on the red benches and listened as this Pastor talked of that glorious day so many years ago. The translator spoke in Lugandan to the men and women around me. I serve the same God here that I do at home, but in a way I feel like I don't. At home God is used to fix my problems, but here I am dependent on His strength. I wake up every morning and grab my Bible because I know He will give me the perfect passage for that day. Before I fall asleep I do the same. And this God -this God I have served for years is showing me more of Himself. Whispering to my soul. Some moments are hard here, but the joy I have recieved and am continuing to recieve reminds me of how great His love is. At the end of the service we walked around to a wooden cross, we placed flowers upon it and suddenly this cross, this cross standing on the roadside in the middle of Africa, this cross standing in the midst of a street filled with dirt and garbage suddenly became beautiful. As I continue to learn about Him, I'm learning that's what He does, every time we are graced with His presence. He continues to bring His glory to our faces, He puts songs in our hearts and joy in our eyes, even though we stand in a world filled of dirt and sin. He makes us beautiful.

I wake up to the sound of the dog barking, rooster crowing, kids crying or some obnoxious bird. Most mornings I am already sweating or will soon be. As soon as I walk outside I have red dirt on me, and the bottoms of my feet are never clean. I read to 12 two year olds and wonder if I am mostly reading to myself. But it's when their tiny fingers reach out and touch the pictures that I am reminded. It's when she extends her hand and practices the proper English greeting "Hello, Auntie. How are you?" we shake hands and it's repeated twenty more times before I sit among them. It's when her deep brown eyes tell me she just needs to be held. It's when I have many babies wanting in my lap and I try my hardest to make room. It's when she lays in my lap being shy to the visitor, but in the short few days I have known her I know she is anything BUT shy. It's when her hands are folded and eyes closed and this small child leads her sisters in prayer. It's when they all sing 'He's got the whole world in His hands..'. It's when I tickle them and they giggle contagiously. It's when he picks me pink flowers. It's when we walk hand in hand along Lake Victoria talking about crocodiles. It's when I kiss their cheeks and get warn smiles. It's when their hands are tucked into mine. It then that I remember. THIS is why I traveled 35 hours to sleep under a mosquito net and live on the equator. THIS is why I gave up all familiar and gave into the call of Jesus. They are why, and they are worth it. They change me, day by day.